In the Rain,in the Cold,in the Dark

在雨中 在寒冷中 在黑夜中

I remember getting the letter from Real Madrid. I tore it up before I even opened it.

我记得当初接到皇马来信。我连一眼都没看就给撕了。

It was the morning of the 2014 World Cup Final,at exactly 11 a.m.,and I was sitting on the stretcherabout to receive an injection in my leg.I had torn my thigh muscle in the quarterfinals,but with anti-inflammatories,I could run without feeling anything.I told the trainers these exact words:"If I break,then let me keep breaking.I don't care.I just want to be able to play."

那是2014年世界杯决赛的上午，正好11点整。我正坐在担架上接受腿部注射。我在四分之一决赛中拉伤了大腿，但用了消炎药，我可以毫无痛苦地奔跑。我当时对训练师们说的确切原话是：“如果我废掉了，那就让我废掉吧。我不在乎。我只想能上场比赛。”

So there I was,putting ice on my leg when our team doctor, Daniel Martínez, came into the room holding this envelope, and he said, “Ángel,look, this paper came from Real Madrid.”

“What?What are you telling me?”,I said.

He said, “Well, they’re saying you’re not in any condition to play. And they are forcing us to not let you play today.”

我正在那给腿冰敷，队医丹尼尔·马丁内斯拿着个信封走进屋。他说：“安赫尔你看，这是皇马来的信。”

“什么？你在说什么？＂我问。

他回答：“他们说你的状况不适合出战，而且强迫我们今天不让你上场。”

I immediately knew what was happening. Everybody had heard the rumors that Real wanted to sign James Rodríguez after the World Cup, and I knew that they were going to sell me to make room for him. So they didn’t want their player to break before they sold it.It was that simple. That’s the business of football that people do not always see.

I told Daniel to give me the letter. I didn’t even open it. I just ripped it into pieces and said, “Throw it away. The only onewho decides here,is me.”

我立刻明白了是怎么回事。所有人都听到传闻，皇马打算在世界杯后签下哈梅斯·罗德里格斯。我也知道他们想把我卖掉，来给他腾地方，因此他们不想让球员在被售出之前受伤贬值。就是这么简单。这就是普通人并不常能窥见的足球生意。

我让丹尼尔把信给我。我根本没打开信封，直接撕了个粉碎。我说：“把这玩意扔了吧。这里能做主的只有一个人，就是我自己。”

I had not slept much the night before. Part of the reason was that the Brazilian fans were setting off fireworks and firecrackersoutside of our hotel through the early morning, but even if everything had been quiet,I think I still wouldn't be able to sleep.It is impossible to explain the feeling you have on the night before a World Cup Final, when everything you ever dreamed about is passingbefore your eyes.

前一天晚上我没怎么睡。部分原因是巴西球迷整个清早都在酒店外面燃放烟花爆竹。但就算当时周围一切都是安静的，我觉得自己还是睡不着。那种感觉难以描述，就是在世界杯决赛前夜，毕生梦想过的一切都在眼前闪现的感觉。

I sincerely wanted to play that day even if it ended my career. But I also didn’t want to make things complicated for our team. So I woke up early that morning and went to see our manager, Mr. Sabella. We had a very close relationship, so if I told him that I wanted to start, I knew that he would feel the pressure to put me in. I told him sincerely, with my hand on my heart, that he should put in the player that he felt he had to put in.

那天我是真心想上场，就算职业生涯就此终结也无所谓。但我不想让球队难做，于是我一早起床去见主帅萨维利亚。我和他关系很亲近，所以如果我跟他说想出战，我知道他会出于压力派我上场的。我手抚心口，诚恳地告诉他，应该派他觉得必须派的球员出场。

［注：hand on my heart有强调真诚甚至起誓的意味］

I said, “If it’s me, it’s me. If it’s another, then it’s another. I just want to win the World Cup. If you call on me, I will play until I break.”

And then I started crying. I couldn’t help it. The moment had overwhelmed me.It was normal.

“如果让我上，那就是我上；若是派别人上，那就是别人上。我只想赢得世界杯。你如果是让我上，我就会一直战斗到整个人废掉为止。”

说完我开始哭泣。无法抑制。我被那一刻的情感所吞没，这也是正常事。

When we had our team talk before the match, Sabella announced that Enzo Pérez was going to start, because he was 100% healthy. And well,he plays,all good.I treated myself with an injection before the match, and again during the second half, so that I would be ready to play if I was called from the bench.

赛前布置战术时，主帅萨维利亚宣布让恩佐·佩雷斯首发，因为他的身体处于百分百的健康状态。行啊，让他上场，挺好的。同时，我在赛前打了一针，下半场又来了一针。这样一旦被召唤，我就可以随时准备好上场。

But the call never came. We lost the World Cup. It was the most difficult day of my life. After the match, the media were saying ugly things about why I didn’t play. But what I’m telling you is the absolute truth.

但召唤从未来临。我们输掉了世界杯。那是我人生中最艰难的一天。比赛之后，媒体开始对我没上场之事进行恶毒抹黑。但我现在给各位讲述的，才是绝对的真相。

What still haunts me is the moment when I went to speak to Sabella, and I broke down in tears in front of him. Because I will always wonder if he thought that I was crying because I was nervous.

时至今日仍在脑中萦绕不去的，是那天跟萨维利亚谈话时，我在他面前崩溃痛哭的场景。我一直纳闷，他是不是以为我是因为紧张才哭泣。

In truth, it had nothing to do with nerves. I was overcome with emotion because of how much the moment meant to me. We were so close to achieving the impossible dream.

其实跟紧张一点关系没有。只是因为那一刻对我的意义如此重大，我激动得无以复加。那个看似不可能的梦，我们只差一点就能实现了。

The walls of our house were supposed to be white. But I never remember them being white. At first they were grey. Then they turned black from all the coal dust. My father was a coal worker, but not the kind in a mine. Have you ever seen charcoal being made? The little bags you buy in the store for your barbeque, they come from somewhere, and honestly it’s a very dirty business. My father used to work under this tin roof on our patio, bagging up all the pieces of charcoal to sell at the market. Well, it wasn’t just him. He had his little helpers, too. Before school, me and my little sister would wake up to help him. We were only like nine or 10 years old, which is the perfect age for bagging charcoal, because you can turn it into a little game. When the coal truck would come, we had to carry the bags through the living room and then out the front door, so ultimately our house turned totally black.

我家的几面墙本来是白色的，但我根本记不得它们白色时的样子。墙面早先是灰色，后来被大量煤灰染黑。我父亲是煤炭工人，但并非下井挖煤的矿工。你们见过炭块是怎么来的吗？那种随处可以买到的，你烧烤时用的小袋炭块，其实是有人装的。说实话，装炭的工作非常脏。我父亲当时在院子里的铁皮屋顶下干活，把所有炭块装成一袋一袋，再拿去市场上卖。也不光他自己干活，还有他的小伙计们帮忙。每天上学前，我们和妹妹会早早起来帮他。当时我们大约9岁10岁左右，正是最适合装炭的年纪，因为可以把这活当游戏来玩。每当卡车抵达时，我们就拿着装炭的袋子穿过客厅，再走出前门。久而久之，整个家都彻底变成黑色了。

But that was the way that we put food on the table, and the way that my father had saved our house from being taken away.

但这就是我们养家糊口的方式，也是我父亲保护房子不被收走的办法。

For a little while, when I was a baby, my parents were doing well. But then my father had tried to do a good thing for someone, and it changed our lives. A friend asked him to sign as a guarantor for his house, and my dad trusted him. The guy ended up falling behind on his payments, and then he just disappeared one day. So the bank went straight to my father. He found himself drowningtrying to pay for two houses, and feed his family.

我还在襁褓之中的那段短暂时间里，我爸妈的日子过得很富足。但后来我父亲大发善心想帮人一把，导致我们的生活从此天翻地覆。一个朋友让父亲替他的房子签名画押做担保，我父亲信任了他。结果那人拖欠债务之后，某天突然跑路消失。银行便直接找父亲索债。同时背负两栋房子的贷款，还要养活一家人，父亲简直是要溺死在压力之中了。

His first business wasn’t actually charcoal. He had tried to turn the front room of our house into a little store. He would buy these big drums of bleach, chlorine, soap and all this cleaning stuff, and then he would divide it up into these little bottles of products and sell them out of our dining room. If you were living in our town, you didn’t go to the store to buy a bottle of CIF. That was way too expensive. You would just come see the Di Marias and my mom would sell you a bottle for a much better price.

刚下海时，他不是干煤炭生意的。他曾经尝试把我家前厅改造成小卖铺。他进货大桶的漂白剂、氯水、洗衣粉等清洁产品，再拆装成小瓶在客厅里售卖。你要是住在我们镇上，根本不用跑去商店买“洁而亮”洗涤剂。那实在是太贵了。你只需光顾迪马利亚小店，我妈妈就会以超低价格卖给你一罐。

It was all going pretty good until one day, their baby boy ruined everything by almost getting himself killed.

Yes, it’s true, I was a little son of a bitch!

日子本来过得很滋润，直到有一天，他们的小儿子毁掉了一切，还差点害死自己。

对，是真事。我当初就是个小王八犊子！［hijo de puta]

I wasn’t really bad, but I just had so much energy. I was hyperactive. So one day my mom was selling in our “shop,” and I was in the walkerplaying around. The front gate was open so that the customers could come in, and my mom got distracted, and I started walking …walking …I kept walking … I wanted to explore,you see!

倒不是说我真的特别“顽劣”，我只是精力旺盛，过度活跃，动个不停。有一天我母亲正在我家“商店”里卖货，而我在学步车里玩耍。为了方便客人们光顾，我家大门敞开着。趁妈妈走神没注意，我开始迈步，走啊...走啊... 继续往外走啊，你瞧，我多有探索精神！

I walked right out into the middle of the street, and my mom had to run like crazyto save me from being hit by a car. Apparently, it was pretty dramatic, from the way she tells it. That was the last day of The Di Maria’s Cleaning Shop. My mom told my dad that it was too dangerous, and we needed to find something else.

我径直走到大马路正中央，妈妈像发疯一般飞奔过来救下我，免得我被汽车撞倒。在她的讲述之中，这是惊天动地的场景。那一天，就是“迪马利亚清洗剂商店”营业的最后一日。妈妈跟爸爸说，这生意太危险了，咱们得换个行当。

So that’s when he found out about this guy who would bring barrels of the coal down from Santiago del Estero. But the funny thing is that we didn’t even have enough money to sell coal! My dad had to convince the guy to front him the first few shipments so that he would sell them and thus start paying him. So, whenever me or my sister wanted some candy or something, my dad loved to say, “I’m paying for two houses and a truck full of coal!”

就在那时，我父亲联系上一位从圣地亚哥运煤到埃斯特罗的哥们。但可笑的是，我们当时连贩煤的启动资金都没有！父亲只能劝说那哥们先预支几批货过来，等卖了再还上他的货款。

因此，每当我或妹妹吵着要糖果什么的，我爸就会说：“我背着两个房子的债务，还欠着一车煤炭的货款呢！”

I remember one day I was bagging up the charcoal with my dad, and it was really cold and raining. All we had was the tin roof over our heads. It was very hard. After a while, I got to go to school, where it was warmer. My dad had to stay out there working, all day. Because if he didn’t sell that day, maybe we wouldn’t have enough to eat, seriously. But I was thinking, and sincerely believing it: At some point, everything is going to change for the good.

For this, I owe football everything.

我记得某天，我们正和爸爸一起给煤炭装袋。天气严寒，冷雨凄凄。我们只有头上区区的铁皮屋顶挡风遮雨，非常难熬。再过一会儿我就能去上学了，学校里更暖和些。但爸爸得继续在冷雨中装袋一整天，一刻不能停歇。因为如果当天不把炭卖掉，我们可能就吃不上饭了。真的。但那时我就在想，并且坚信：“早晚有一天，一切都会好起来的。”

我好起来的一生，全都拜足球所赐。

Sometimes it pays off to be a little son of a bitch! I started football early, because I was driving my mother crazy. She actually took me to the doctor when I was four years old, and she said, “Doctor, he never stops running around. What do I do?”

And he was a good Argentine doctor, so of course he said, “What do you do? Football.”

That's how I started my football career.

有时当个小混蛋也挺不错的。我很早就开始踢足球，因为母亲要被我逼疯了。我4岁时她甚至带我去看医生：“医生，这孩子跑来跑去一刻不停。我该怎么办啊？”

作为一名优秀的阿根廷医生，他当然会给出这样的回答：“该怎么办？踢足球去啊。

这，就是我足球生涯的开端。

I was obsessed. It’s all I did. I played so much, so much footballthat every two months, my boots would literally break apart, and my mother would glue them together with POXI-ran, because we didn’t have the money to buy new ones. When I was seven years old, I must have been pretty good, because I scored 64 goals for my neighborhood team, and my mother came into my bedroom one day and said, “The radio station wants to talk to you.”

我痴迷于足球，整天只干这一件事。我不停地踢球，不停地踢，以至于每两个月鞋子就会被我踢破开胶。妈妈只好用万能胶粘起来，因为我们没钱买新鞋。我到7岁时，肯定是已经踢得相当厉害了，因为我为社区足球队打进了64个球。有一天妈妈走进卧室跟我说：“电台的人想和你聊聊。”

We went down to the station so they could interview me, and I was so shy that I could barely speak.

That year, my dad got a phone call from the youth coach of Rosario Central saying that they wanted me to play there. This was actually a very funny situation, because my father is a huge supporter of Newell’s Old Boys. My mother is the huge supporter of Central. If you’re not from Rosario, you will never be able to understand the passionand rivalry that exists. It is like life and death. When the Classic was on, my mother and father would be screaming like crazy,shouting at the top of their lungs with every goal, and the winner would taunt the other one for a whole month about it.

我们去了电台接受采访。但我那时候太羞涩了，几乎一句话都说不出来。

那一年，爸爸接到了罗萨里奥中央队教练的电话。教练说想看我到那里去踢球。当时的局面非常搞笑，因为我父亲一直是纽维尔老男孩的铁粉，而我母亲是罗萨里奥中央的死忠。如果你不是罗萨里奥人，你永远无法理解双方球迷间的激情和敌对。真叫一个你死我活！每次两队踢德比时，我父母就发疯狂吼，为每一粒进球喊破喉咙。最终获胜的一方会奚落另一方整整一个月。

So you can just imagine how excited my mom was when Central came calling for me.

My dad said, “Oh, I don’t know. It’s too far away. It’s nine kilometers! We don’t have a car! How will we get him there?”

And my mom said, “No, no, no! Don’t worry, I’ll take him! It’s no problem!”

And that is when Graciela was born.

所以你也能想得到，得知我被罗萨里奥中央征召时，我母亲有多激动。

但父亲则有些担忧：“啊这个，路途有些远啊。足足9公里呢！咱家又没车，要怎么送他去呢？”

而妈妈说：“不不不，你不用担心！我带他去！绝对不是问题！”

就在那时，格蕾夏拉诞生了。

［注：西语名Graciela跟英文名Grace同源，均来自拉丁语gratia,表示优雅／亲切；另外也有一层gracias的感激之意。西语gracias同样源自gratia.]

Graciela was a rusty old yellow bicycle that my mother would use to drive me to training every day. It had a little basket in the front and a space for another person to sit in the back, but there was a problem, because my little sister had to come with us, too. So with a saw, my father cut a square on such each side of the basket,and that’s where my sister would sit.

格蕾夏拉是一辆生锈的黄色自行车。妈妈每天骑着她送我去训练。车前方有个小筐，后面另有一个载人的座位。但问题出现了，我妹妹也得跟我们一起去。于是父亲就用锯子切了架子安在车筐两边，妹妹就坐在那里。

So just imagine this: A woman biking through town with a little boy on the back and a little girl in the front, and a sports bag in the front basket with my boots and some snacks. Up hills. Down hills. Through the dangerous neighborhoods. In the rain. In the cold. In the dark. It didn’t matter. My mother just kept pedaling.

Graciela got us where we needed to go.

那么请想象一下：一个女人骑着自行车穿行罗萨里奥，男孩子坐后座，女孩子坐前面，车筐里放着装有我的鞋子和食物的运动包。上坡，下坡，穿行过危险的街区。在雨中，在寒冷中，在黑夜中，她毫不在乎，妈妈只是继续蹬车前行。

格蕾夏拉能带我们到想去的任何地方。

Even so, the truth is that my time at Central was not easy. In fact, I would have quit football if it were not for my mother. Not once, but twice.When I was 15, I was still not growing, and I had a coach that was a bit nutty. He preferred players who were physical and aggressive, and that was just not my style. One day, I didn’t jump up for a cornerand at the end of training, he gathered all the players around and then he turned to me …

但其实我在罗萨里奥中央的日子很难熬。如果不是因为我母亲，我可能早已放弃足球了。而且不是放弃一次，是两次。15岁时，我的体格仍然没有长起来。我的教练有点疯狂，他偏爱身体健壮、对抗凶狠的球员，但这不是我的风格。有一天，角球时我没能跳起争头球。训练结束时教练把我们聚在一起，他转过身冲着我吼：

“You’re shit. You’re a disaster. You’re never going to amount to anything. You are going to be a failure.”, he said.

I was devastated. Before he even finished, I started crying in front of all my teammates, and I ran off the field.

“你就是坨狗屎！你就是个灾难。你将永远一事无成。你就是个失败者！”

我彻底被击垮了。他话还没说完，我就已经当着队友的面失声痛哭，跑出了球场。

When I got home, I went straight into my room to cry alone. My mother knew something was wrong, because every night when I got home from training, I would leave my things and go play more footballon the street. She came into my room and asked what was wrong, and I was a little scared to tell her the whole truth because I was worried she would bike all the way there and try to punch my coach. She was such a calm person, but if you did anything to her kids … Man! Start running!

回到家，我直接跑进房间独自哭泣。妈妈察觉到事情不对，因为平时训练后我都会扔下东西，去街上再踢一会儿球。她到房间里问我出了什么状况。我有些害怕，不敢告诉她全部事实。因为我怕她听完会立刻蹬着单车到俱乐部去揍我的教练。她本是个极其平和的人，但你要是动了她的孩子。。. 哥们！赶快逃命吧！

I told her that I got into a fight, but she knew it was a lie. So she did what all mothers in the world do in that situation — she called the mother of one of my teammates to find out the truth.

我说我打架了，但她识破我在撒谎。于是她做了在这种状况下世上所有母亲都会做的事：给我一位队友的母亲打电话，询问到底发生了什么事。

When she came back in the room, I was crying so much, and I told her that I wanted to quit playing football. The next day, I couldn’t even leave the house. I didn’t want to go to school. I was too humiliated. But then my mother sat down on my bed, and she said, “You’re going back, Ángel. You’re going back today. You need to go prove yourself to him.”

她回到房间时我仍在痛哭。我告诉她我想放弃踢球了。第二天我甚至连家门都不想出。我不想上学，因为感觉自己太丢人。但妈妈坐到床边对我说：“你得回去，安赫尔。今天就得回去。你必须要证明给那个家伙看。”

I went back to training that day, and the most incredible thing happened. To begin with,my teammates didn’t make fun of me. On the contrary, they actually helped me. With each ball that came from above, and the defenders would let me win the header. They made sure that I was feeling good. Football is such a competitive game, especially in South America. Everyone is just trying to make it to a better life, you know? But I will always, alwaysremember that day, because those teammates saw that I was suffering and they helped me.

当天我回去训练，最难以置信的事发生了。首先，没有一名队友来嘲笑我。正好相反，他们来帮助我了。每次争顶头球时，防守球员都会故意让我赢。简直就是在确保我能踢得开心。足球是竞争激烈的运动，尤其在南美洲。每一个踢球的人都想过上更好的生活，知道吗？但我会永永远远记得那一天，因为队友们看到我在经历痛苦，对我伸出了援手。

Even so, I was so small and so skinny. At 16, I still wasn’t in the senior team at Central, and my father was getting worried. We sat at the kitchen table one night, and he said, “You have three options: You can go to work with me. You can finish school. Or you can try one more year in football. But if it doesn’t work out, you have to come work with me.”

即便如此，我那时仍然又小又瘦。到了16岁我还是没能进入主力队，我父亲很担忧。某天晚上，我们坐在厨房餐桌旁，他对我说：“你有三个选择：一是跟我去干活，二是完成学业，三是你再尝试踢一年球。但如果踢不出成绩，那就得跟着我一起工作。”

I didn’t say anything. It was a complicated situation. We needed money.And then it was my mother who spoke up and said, “One more year in football.”That was in January.In December, the very last month that we had set ourselves … I made my debut for Central in the Primera División.

我一言不发。当时情况很复杂。我们家需要钱。

但我妈妈站出来表态：“再踢一年足球。”

当时是1月份。

到了年底12月，在“一年之约”的最后一个月，我迎来了在罗萨里奥的甲级联赛首秀。

From that day, my sports life began. But in truth, the fight started so long before that. It started with my mother glueing my boots back together, and with her riding Graciela through the rain. Even when I made it as a professional in Argentina, it was still a fight. I don’t think people outside of South America can fully understand what it’s like. You have to live some of the experiences to believe it.

自那天起，我的体育生涯开始了。但说实话这场战斗此前很早就开始了，始于妈妈为我粘补球鞋之日，始于她蹬着格蕾夏拉在雨中骑行之时。甚至当我第一次作为职业球员在阿根廷首秀时，这仍然是一场战斗。我觉得非南美人很难完全理解这种感觉，得要经历过这种生活才能明白。

I will never forget when we had to play a Libertadores game in Colombia against Nacional, because plane is not the same as in the Premier League or La Liga. It’s not even the same as when you play in Buenos Aires. Because back then, there was no international airport in Rosario. You showed up at the little airport, and the first plane was there that day was the one you got on. You didn’t ask questions.

我永远不会忘记我们启程去哥伦比亚，跟麦德林国民队踢解放者杯时的场景。因为当初的飞机并没有英超和西甲那样的水准，甚至还不如在布宜诺斯艾利斯踢球时的飞机好。在那时，罗萨里奥还没有国际机场。你来到一个小小的机场，不管当天看到的第一架飞机是什么，你直接登上去就完了。别多问。

So we showed up for this flight to Colombia … and there was one of those huge cargo planes on the runway. You know the ones with the big ramp in the back that they use to ship cars and stuff? Well, that was our plane. A Hercules.

我们来到机场准备飞去哥伦比亚。。. 在停机坪上看到一架庞然大物。你知道那种后面有坡道，能运汽车和集装箱什么的货机吗？对，那就是我们的航班，大力神飞机。

The ramp came down, and the workers started loading all these mattresses into the plane.And all the players were looking at one another like, What?

斜坡放下来，工作人员开始往飞机上搬运床垫。球员全都面面相觑：咋回事？

So we went to board the plane, and the maintenance people were like, “No, guys, you go in the back. And here, take these headphones.”

登机后，机组人员告诉我们：“不对，各位，你们的位置在后边。给，拿着这些耳机吧。”

They had to give us those gigantic headphones that the military use to block out the noise. We climbed onto the platform, and there were a few seats and some mattresses for us to lie on. For eight hours. To a Libertadores match. They closed the ramp, and it got super dark. We were just lying there on the mattresses with our headphones on, and we can barely hear one another. The plane starts to taix, and we begin to move,and after to takeoff, we go sliding down the ramp a little bit, all the way to the back of the plane, and one of my teammates shouts, “Nobody touch the big red button! If that door opens, we’re all gone to hell!’

他们必须得给我们配备巨大的耳机，就是军队戴着阻隔噪音的那种。机上有些座位和垫子供我们休息。飞行时长8小时，为了打一场解放者杯比赛。坡道收起，机舱内至暗无比，我们躺在床垫上戴着耳机，甚至听不见我们自己的声音。飞机开始滑行，我们也开始晃动。起飞之后，我们都顺着坡道往下滑。一个队友高喊：“谁也别碰那个红色按钮！舱门要是开了，我们都会摔死！”

It was incredible. If I hadn't lived it, I wouldn’t believe it. But you can ask my teammates. It really happened. That was our version of a private plane. Hercules!

简直难以置信。我若非亲身经历，也无法相信。但我那些队友可以作证，这都是真的。这就是我们专属版的私人飞机：大力神！

Believe it or not, that memory gives me a little happiness. When you’re trying to make it in football in Argentina, you have to do whatever it takes. Whatever plane shows up that day, you get on that plane, and you don’t ask questions.

不管你是否相信，这次的经历真的给我留下一些开心的回忆。想在阿根廷足球界出人头地，就得迎接一切挑战。所以到了那天不管出现的是什么飞机，你都必须登机，不要多问。

Eventually, if you get the opportunity, you take the plane with a one-way ticket. For me, that opportunity was in Portugal with Benfica. Maybe some people look at my career and they think, “Wow, he went to Benfica, then Real Madrid, Manchester United, PSG,” and maybe it seems simple. But you can’t imagine how many things happened in between. When I got to Benfica, at age 19, I barely played for two seasons. My father gave up his job to move to Portugal with me, and he had to be separated by an ocean from my mother. There were nights when I heard him on the phone with my mom, and he was crying because he missed her so much.

At times, it seemed like a huge mistake. I wasn’t starting, and I wanted to quit and go back home.

最终，如果得到机会，你就会坐登上一班单程飞机。对我来说，这个机会就在葡萄牙的本菲卡。也许今天你们看到我的职业履历会想：“哇哦，他去过本菲卡，然后是皇马、曼联、PSG.”貌似轻而易举。但你们无法想象其间发生过多少事情。抵达本菲卡之后，我几乎两个赛季没机会踢球。父亲丢下工作来葡萄牙陪我，被迫和母亲分隔一个大洋的距离。有几次我晚上听到俩人打电话时，父亲都在哭泣，因为他太思念妈妈了。

有时候，我觉得这是天大的错误。踢不上球，我只想要辞职回家。

Then the 2008 Olympics changed my whole life. Argentina called me to play for the team even though I wasn’t starting for Benfica. I will never forget that. That tournament gave me the opportunity to play with Leo Messi, the extraterrestrial, the genius. It was the most fun I’ve ever had playing football. All I had to do was run into space. I would start running, and the ball would arrive at my feet. Like magic.

随后，2008年奥运会改变了我的人生。虽然我从未为本菲卡上过场，但阿根廷国家队还是征召了我。此事令我永世难忘。那次比赛让我有机会和里奥·梅西一起踢球，就是那个天外来客，那个天才选手。那次大赛是我踢球踢得最开心的一次，我要做的只是跑到空位。只要我跑起来，球就会喂到我脚下。如同魔法一般。

Leo’s eyes don’t work like your eyes and my eyes work. They look side to side, like a human. But he’s also able to see the world from above, like a bird. I don’t understand how it’s possible. But it is so.

梅西的眼睛和你我的眼睛运作方式完全不同，能像正常人那样从一边看到另一边，但他还能开启上帝视角，鸟瞰一切，我不知道这怎么可能。但他真的做到了。

We were able to make it all the way to the final against Nigeria, and it was probably the most incredible day of my life. To score the goal to win the gold medal for Argentina … you can’t even imagine that feeling.

我们一路凯歌杀进决赛对阵尼日利亚。那可能是我人生中最不可思议的一天。打入让阿根廷国家队夺得奥运金牌的进球。。. . . . 你无法想象那种激动心情。

You have to understand, I was 20 years old, and not even playing for Benfica. My family was separated. I was at a moment of hopelessness before Argentina called me for that tournament. In just two years, I won a gold medal, I started playing for Benfica, and then I got transfered to Real Madrid.

你要明白，我当时已经20岁，还没为本菲卡上过场。我的家人被迫分离、天各一方。在国奥队的征召到来前，我正处于一段绝望的时期。仅仅两年间，我就拿到了奥运金牌，也开始在本菲卡上场踢球，后来转会到皇马。

It was a moment of pride not just for me, but for my entire family and for all my friends and teammates who supported me over the years. They say that my father was an even better footballer than me, but he broke his knees when he was young, and his dream died. They say that my grandfather was even better than him, but he lost both of his legs in a train accident, and his dream died.

这一骄傲时刻不仅属于我，也属于我的家人和多年来支持我的所有亲朋和队友。他们说我父亲曾是比我更厉害的球员，但他年纪时膝盖受伤，足球梦碎。他们还说我的足球梦也破灭了。

My dream was close to dying so many times.

我的足球梦想，也曾许多次走到破灭边缘。

But my father kept working under the tin roof … my mother kept pedaling … I kept running into space …

但我爸坚持铁皮屋顶下工作，我妈坚持蹬着自行车...我坚持在场上跑到空位。

I don’t know if you believe in fate, but when I scored my first goal for Real Madrid, do you know the name of the team we were playing?

Hércules CF.

我不知道你们是否相信命运，但我为皇马打进第一个球时，你们知道对战的球队叫什么吗？

大力神足球俱乐部。［Hércules CF. ]

We came a long way.

这一路走来，颇为漫长。

So maybe you can understand now why I was crying in front of Sabella before the World Cup Final. I was not nervous. I was not worried about my career. I was not even worried about starting the match.

不过现在你们或许能明白，为什么2014年世界杯决赛之前，我会在萨维利亚面前哭泣。我并不是紧张，也不是在担心自己的职业生涯，甚至都没担心能否上场。

Hand on my heart, the truth is that I just wanted us to achieve our dream. I wanted us to be remembered as legends in our country. We were so close.…

说实话，我真心只是想实现我们的梦想，希望我们能作为国家的传奇英雄被人们铭记。而我们离实现这个梦想是那么接近。。.

That’s why it’s so heartbreaking to me when I see the reaction to our team in the media in Argentina. At times, the negativity and criticism is out of control. It is not healthy. We are all human beings, and we have things going on in our lives that people do not see.

所以看到阿根廷媒体对我们队的评价时，我真的感到失天盖地。这样是不健康的。我们都是人，我们生活中遇到的问题是大众们看不到的。

In fact, just before the endof the qualifying games, I started seeing a psychologist. I was going through a difficult moment in my head, and usually I can rely on my family to get me through those times. But this time, the pressure was very intense with the national team, so I turned to a psychologist, and it really helped me. In the final two matches, I was much looser and more relaxed.

其实，我看心理医生，就是从世界杯预选赛结束之前开始的。我当时正经历一段艰难的心理挣扎，通常我会依赖家人朋友的帮助渡过难关。但这次国家队带来的压力实在太大，所以我去看心理医生，这真的给我带来了帮助。在最后两场比赛里，我确实踢得更加松弛洒脱了。

I reminded myself that I was part of one of the best teams in the world, and that I was playing for my country, living a dream I had as a child. Sometimes, as professionals, we can forget those little things.

我提醒自己，我是世界上最优秀球队中的一员，我在为自己的国家战斗，在实现儿时的梦想。有时作为职业球员，我们会忘记这样的小事。

The game became a game again.

比赛最终回归了比赛本身。

I think that nowadays people look on Instagram or YouTube, and they see the results, but they don’t see the cost. They don’t know what you went through to get there. They see me holding my daughter and smiling with the Champions League trophy, and they think that everything is perfect. But they don’t know that just a year before the photo was taken, she was born premature and spent two months in the hospital, hooked up to tubes and wires.

我觉得在如今这个时代，人们在Instagram或YouTube上关注你，他们却只能看到结果，但看不到代价，看不到你走到这里一路经历了什么坎坷。他们看到我抱着女儿，手捧欧冠奖杯微笑，他们会认为一切完美。但也许他们不知道，就在拍下这张照片的一年前，她是个早产儿，浑身接满了管子和电线，在医院度过了两个月。

Maybe they see a picture of me crying with the trophy, and they think that I’m crying because of football. But in reality, I am crying because my daughter is there in my arms to live that moment with me.

也许他们看到我抱着奖杯哭泣，会认为我是为了足球而落泪。但实际上我流泪是因为女儿正健康地在我怀中，陪我见证这一切。

They watch the World Cup Final, and all they see is a result.

他们观看世界杯决赛，但看到的只是结果。

0–1.

But they don’t see how hard so many of us fought to get to that moment.

They don’t know about my living room walls turning from white to black. They don’t know about my father working under a little tin roof. They don’t know about my mother riding Graciela through the rain and the cold, for her children.They don’t know about Hercules.

0–1.

但他们看不到，为走到这一步，我们许多人经历了怎样的拼搏。

他们不知道，我家客厅的墙壁从白染成黑。他们不知道，我父亲在铁皮屋顶下劳作。他们不知道，我妈妈为了她的孩子们，骑着格蕾夏拉在冷雨中不断前行。他们也不知道大力神。